


A Heart Full of Love

by tangledintime



Category: Critical Role
Genre: A LOT of Angst, Angst, F/M, Percy is oblivious, one sided vex/percy, vex is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-05
Packaged: 2018-09-06 14:14:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8755756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tangledintime/pseuds/tangledintime
Summary: She knows he was never hers to loose, but she can't help but think, as he's declaring his love for the woman in front of him, that those words should be meant for her.
In which Vex'ahlia learns about love through someone else. Or the AU in which Percy never gets killed by Ripley, therefore never hearing Vex's confession.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Based on Eponine's part in the song 'In My Life/Heart Full of Love', from Les Miserables.

They defeat Ripley by the skin of their teeth. Vex has just enough strength in her to deliver the final blow, her arrows piercing her heart and slicing into her mouth, a silent scream leaving the evil woman's body. As the rain batters down around them, Grog rips the cloak from Ripley's barely dead corpse and Vex immediately runs to Percy, who is bleeding out on the ground. 

Keyleth looks at her, a tired, small smile on her face. "He'll make it."

And something in Vex snaps. Her tears flood her vision, running down her cheeks with no intention of stopping. Today was one of those days where she thought that Percy was truly dead. But Keyleth's words, and being able to see his chest slowly rise and fall with breath, albeit it weak breath. Her Percy is still alive, that bitch couldn't kill him not matter how hard she tried. 

Everyone's watching her sob into the human's chest but she honestly couldn't give a damn. Percival Fredrickstein Von Mussel De Rolo III, the man she had given her heart to all those months ago, was okay. 

-

Honestly, she's not sure if it was bad luck, or maybe her deep seated insecurity that stopped her from ever admitting how she felt. 

She had come very close before. The closest being after he had given her the title of Baroness. Vex could've done a lot more than kiss him at that particular moment but she refrained. She did that a lot, refraining. She held herself back from doing so many things and one of those things was letting herself be happy. Percy woke up from that fight surprised he was alive, thanked the gods that Ripley was finally dead and gone, and then went back to being the same stupid disaster of a human that she had fallen in love with. His mind was already set upon how to take out the remaining dragons, and acquiring the rest of the Vestiges. 

The rest of the team were uncomfortable, Vex could tell. Grog, at every opportunity, tried to tell Percy about her little episode, but was shushed by Scanlan who for once knew when enough was enough. Vax was silent for the most part, casting the occasional, yet highly concerned glance at his sister but the worst of all was Keyleth, who kept looking at her with this look of apology, like she already knew that she was never going to tell Percy the truth. Vex wouldn't hate that look so much if it weren't true. 

The next and last time she had gotten close was at a pub in Whitestone. At the request of Percy, Scanlan and Grog, Vox Machina was to get completely shitfaced as a celebration of the death of their most hated foe. They successfully did. Pike, who they had met there, was the first to loose all inhibition, passing out after two shots of whatever Grog was keeping in the cask he got from Ank'Harel. Vax and Scalan were soon after, and then it was a domino effect. Vex had gone outside for some fresh air, to sober herself up slightly and very soon after Percy had emerged from the tavern, singing loudly some Celestial tune she didn't recognise. 

"Hello, Vex." he slurred in that beautiful accent of his. 

"Hello, Percy." He teetered a bit on his feet. "Feeling alright?" 

"Feeling splendid, quite frankly." He hiccuped, smiling stupidly. "The woman who ruined my life is finally gone. I feel fucking fantastic." 

"Well, if you didn't, then you would be heartless." 

He nodded, leaning against the same wall she was, putting barely any space between them. "Do you want to know why I gave you your title, Vex?" 

Her cheeks heat up at the mention of that, but she nods nonetheless. "I gave it to you because your father was being the biggest fucking prick there ever was." 

She chuckles a little, but it comes out as both a giggle and a snort. She forgot she was drunk too. "He was always like that."

"Well, he shouldn't treat you that way." His eyes, clouded over from the drink and tired from the many things he's seen gaze into hers and she fucking swears her breath leaves her lungs with a whoosh. "I won't let him." 

Vex wets her lips nervously, knowing, even in her drunken stupor, that it was now or never. "Percy-" 

She would never finish that sentence, as the boys, Keyleth and a passed out Pike come crashing out the door, screaming at them that Grog was inside having a shot contest with another patron of the tavern. Percy runs back in immediately leaving Vex with an unfinished thought and a sudden sobriety that puts her in a mood for the rest of the night.

She doesn't go back into the tavern. 

-

The dragons become a more pressing matter and soon Vex tucks her feelings for Percy away for another time. Vox Machina take out Vorugal first, the Frigid Doom, along with the Diseased Deceiver, the green dragon Rashian who too falls to the might of the adventuring party. Thordak is all that's left, it's a long and tough battle but eventually, Tal'Dorei is free from the Chrome Conclave. 

Vox Machina travels back to Whitestone after Emon is rebuilt, to tell Cassandra about what has transpired. They stay there for awhile, while Greyskull Keep is being refurbished and in this time Vex truly realises she can't ever get what she wants. 

Whitestone has a ball, in celebration of the Conclave's defeat. Everyone from all over Tal'Dorei is invited, including a lot of Vox Machina's allies. Kima and Allura go together, and Grog nearly keels over with laughter at the sight of Kima in a dress. Gilmore comes in all his extravagance, capturing Vax's attention for the evening. Somehow even Kaylie shows up, promoting Scanlan to don the ruse of 'Protective Dad' and ends up not drinking, a rare occurrence. Percy is not with them most of the time. Being Lord of Whitestone requires him to be carted off to respectable people and in his own words, "People he knows would not enjoy the company of his actual friends." Vex wasn't sure if he was complimenting them or insulting them. 

As the night draws to a close, the last song is playing from Dr. Dranzel's group. Vax is slow dancing with Keyleth, Pike has a very enthusiastic Scanlan up dancing next to Allura and Kima, and Grog is passed out at one of the tables, his head in some plate of food. Vex sits on her own, downing another shot as she silently fumes at the sight in front of her. Cassandra, throughly worn out from the nights festivities, plops down next to the Half-Elf, sighing. 

"Cassandra." Vex half smiles. "You held a wonderful evening, darling, thank you." 

"It wasn't all me. Percival did most of the planning." At the mention of his name, Vex can't help but smile. Cassandra catches it before she can hide it. "You really love him, don't you?" 

Vex nods, no point in hiding it now. "Oh," she frowns, that word is said like she's sorry for her, she doesn't like that. "Oh, Vex, I'm so sorry."

The Half-Elf is truly panicked now. "What?" 

"I thought Percy told you." that fucker, she's going to kill him. "While, yes this ball was for the defeat of the dragons, it was also Percy's welcome home party. Percy's staying here in Whitestone."

That was it? Maybe Vex might not kill him just yet.

"And tradition requires he must take a wife." Cassandra's gaze is not on her anymore, but off to the dance floor. Vex unwillingly turns her head and watches in horror as Percy, her Percy, is waltzing with some rich, pretentious Lady, her head on his chest. 

Vex was definitely going to kill him. 

-

Three months seemed like the longest time in the world, and yet sometimes it seemed like the quickest.

In three months, Percy announced his relationship to Victoria Aldaar, a lady from somewhere Vex doesn't give a fuck about. In three months Vox Machina looses one of it's members to tradition and rich snobbery and in three months a bit Vex'ahlia's soul crumbles away every time they take a trip back to Whitestone. 

And the worst fucking thing about it is that Victoria is probably the nicest fucking person she's met. She's attentive, kind, smart. Keyleth takes a shine to her immediately, with Pike following soon after. Grog is won over with the woman's ability to spare and Scanlan just likes the look of her. Vax isn't too keen on her however, much like his sister. "I don't care why you don't like her," he said once when they raided Scanlan's wine cellar. "I just care that you don't."

For the first time in forever, Vex actually talks to her brother, and he listens. 

At the end of the three months, her soul completely shatters when they sit for dinner. Percy gets up from his seat, asks the room for their attention and Vex silently pleads he's not doing what she thinks he's doing. He begins a speech of well crafted, love laced words that prick and pull at Vex's heart so much that tears come to her eyes. 

She knows he was never hers to loose, but she can't help but think, as he's declaring his love for the woman in front of him, that those words should be meant for her.

He proposes to Victoria and of course she says yes because it's fucking Percy De Rolo and why wouldn't she? Vex drowns her sorrows in vodka and shouts her problems at Trinket, hoping it would take the pain away. 

(It doesn't) 

-

Lord and Lady Percival De Rolo marry in the spring. Vox Machina is present and Vex finds it in her to smile, even when they are reading their vows and shatter her heart as they seal the deal with a kiss. Keyleth hugs her that night as she skips the reception and cries for most of the night. 

What she doesn't expect is Percy to come look for her. He knocks on her door and Keyleth excuses herself, giving her a thumbs up as she leaves, a completely Keyleth thing to do. "Where were you?" Percy asks, a little edge in his tone. 

She sniffles, her eyes stinging. "I felt sick, Keyleth brought me up." her hollow heart cries liar, liar, liar, but she can't bring herself to care.

Percy kneels in front of her, looking as beautiful as ever, but quite more radiant in his wedding attire. "Vex, you've been acting weirdly ever since the dragons were defeated." Oh darling, it's been a lot longer than that. "Please tell me what's wrong?" 

There was so much wrong with her, she didn't know where to start.

"Victoria really wants to get to know you."

"I wasn't feeling well, Keyleth brought me up." She repeats, knowing that if she says something else she's not sure she'd be able to stop herself. 

He leaves, unsatisfied and silently angry at her response. Keyleth comes in moments after, hugging her once again. "You're going to hate what I have to say, but you need to move on." 

Vex cries harder, not because she doesn't want to know, but because she knows it's true.

-

Eventually, she does move on, from everything. 

She leaves Vox Machina, with the blessing of Vax because she can't handle it anymore. When Vox Machina get the news that Percy and Victoria have welcomed a son she grabs Fenthris and leaves. Percy is fine without her, she was just a lonely soul who wanted someone to call her own. Saundor was right, she was broken, and Percy was the one to break her. She says her goodbyes in private, all personal, all loving. She gives a letter to Keyleth for Percy, explaining everything. Percy will eventually read that letter and that letter would promptly end up in a crumpled ball in his workshop which promptly would get completely decimated in his outburst. 

Right now, Vex can finally say she's okay. She'll visit Vax as much as she can and eventually will make her way back to her family, but right now, she needs to be alone. Well, not really, she's got Trinket, she's got her bow. What else can a girl need? 

(In the back of her head, a little voice calls out, "You need love.") 

(She ignores it)


End file.
